Monday 31 July 2017

How To Write Gay Characters


We live in a cursed time when any sign of diversity in the media is taken as a political statement instead of just natural order. This means we're going to see less gay characters within mainstream media. When there is a gay character, it's going to receive enormous fanfare and the entire marketing will be built around it...and the character will probably only show up for five seconds.

This is my attempt to stop this. If you're a writer, this is how you make you add a drop of rainbow to your work:



Straight Writers CAN Do It


In fact, some of the worst written LGBTQ+ characters I've encountered have either been created or at least approved by LGBTQ+ writers. This squeamishness concerning gay characters is not only ridiculous, but extremely damaging. Very few writers belong to a minority group - that's why we're referred to as a minority. You cannot sit there and wait for a Muslim writer to create a great Muslim protagonist, because you're just making the lack of representation even worse.

Obviously, writing a character that's a different gender/race/sexuality/with different beliefs should be undertaken with great care and even greater thought. But of course you're a great thinker. You're a fucking writer! You know you need to do your research, take your time, stare out of a window, and pour over a desk overflowing with notes.

Look at the amount of research that goes into your average crime novel. I'll wager that the majority of crime writers don't have a history in law enforcement, or - more importantly - haven't murdered anyone. So that's months, possibly years, of researching the average protocol the police undertake with murder cases, research some exceptions, build a detailed picture of how a person in law enforcement would react to certain circumstances. And then there's reverse-engineering the crime itself; working out how exactly how the crime took place, what all the motives are, what fatal mistakes are made, all the time working backwards to see how the protagonist can realistically figure out what's going on. Crime writers might spend months just trying to build a detailed coroner report; which requires going through declassified police records for days in order to get the language right.

You're telling me that your average crime writer can go through all that shit...but not be able to write a gay character? You're not able to just go to a gay bar and talk? Or visit LGBT-related online forums? Or read gay memoirs? Read up on your Queer Theorists and work backwards to see how this relates to your average gay person? See how someone might realistically wear their sexuality, the same way a crime protagonist wears their job, their flaws, their hopes, their dreams?

Being a writer means quadruple guessing your every move every second of your life. Everything should be making you uncomfortable. You aren't qualified to write about anything, but you're going to do it anyway because who else will?


Don't Stereotype 


There's a really shit Madonna movie called The Next Best Thing. Even for the low standard of Madonna movies, it's pretty bad. It concerns a woman and her gay best friend accidentally getting pregnant and deciding to raise a boy together. This sounds like a only slightly painful romantic comedy except for Madonna not being likeable at all as the lead, and the script being terrible.

But, this is absolutely essential to watch because of how well it succeeds, and how much it fails, at realistically portraying a gay protagonist. Robert is played by Rupert Everett; who himself is an openly gay actor. He does a surprisingly excellent job making the role believable and surprising audiences in 2000 with a character we have yet to see in 2017. There's also the one good scene of the movie: where a pre-'out' Neil Patrick Harris plays a gay man who's lost his boyfriend to AIDS. We see the funeral, and it's heartbreaking in how the film acknowledges homophobia and hetero-normativity without directly mentioning it.


Notice it? Harris's character grumpily complains about how his lover didn't want such a sombre burial. Combine this with the fact that Harris and his friends are standing far away from the burial, rejected by the lover's family, enforces the impression that Harris's lover's sexuality is being erased even when he died of AIDS. He's being obliterated from society, just as countless still are.

Notice something else? NO STEREOTYPES. No snapping fingers. No unorthodox fashions. No drag. These characters are, surprise - PEOPLE!

Compare this to another scene in the movie, which...urgh. Robert needs to get the keys off-of Madonna's ex boyfriend, so he dresses flamboyantly and pretends to be the ex's gay lover in order to embarrass him in front of his colleagues - who are horrifically racist stereotypes of the 'black homophobe' right down to the minor detail that they're eating fried chicken. Also, Robert is apparently so gay he doesn't know that sex = babies. (I know gay rights were almost non-existent pre-2010, but I didn't know you weren't even educated in basic biology...)

Stereotypes are not only the biggest signification of shit writing; they're dangerous. I remember watching all the horrible stereotypes in Extra's and thinking: "Is this what society thinks of me? Am I really just a punchline?" You should never put anyone in this position; especially someone who's taken the time and effort to enjoy your artwork.


There Is No 'Type' or 'Average'


There is no such thing as an 'average' person. There are people who regard themselves as 'average;' but even the overwhelming desire to conform is a noteworthy trait that separates said person. Whilst it's possible to write a character who faces issues we all deal with, if you've ever described someone you're writing as 'average' then step away from the keyboard because you're not a writer.

It's more likely for a gay character to be described as 'average' not necessarily because of stereotypes (we've dealt with that) but because LGBTQ+ people are more likely to face the same issue: identity crisis, hate, self-loathing, detachment, complete insanity in the face of a world that doesn't give a shit etc etc. I mentioned earlier about characters 'wearing' their sexuality, and I think that sums up what being gay is like. Your sexuality isn't you, per say. But nor is it just a preference. Imagine if you suddenly realised you were actually left-handed. You can't just go back to using the right.

Unless you want to write a story concerning gay rights, or the struggles of homosexuality, then I would develop all your characters first before bothering about sexuality. Again: start from the ground-up. Your characters have enough to deal with with all the responsibilities of the world you've created thrust upon them. Work out how they deal with that first.

A while ago I was writing a piece where Romeo and Juliet crossed with Two Gentlemen Of Verona; because the two Shakespeare plays are both set in the same place, have a similar structure, and shared plot-elements. I suddenly realised that Romeo isn't straight because...well, he falls in love with everything. He's not necessarily in love with Juliet, he's in love with being in love. Juliet is but another work of beauty that feeds Romeo's need for ecstasy. (I stopped writing this story because a professional editor said it was shit and it won an award for 'Best Writing.')

Take any character you've already written, look at that character, and say: "This person is now gay." Then ask yourself: "Why doesn't it fit? What have I undermined?" If you can't answer those questions then congratulations! Your character just came out to you.


Choose The 'Coming Out' Carefully


If your story doesn't include romance then the best way for your character to 'come out' to the reader/viewer/player is the same way I like to come out to people - with absolutely no fanfare. When I was younger, I really wished my parents would just catch me with a man. It's the sort of thing you'd look at and just think "oh, right. I'll be over here if you need me." Just show your character expressing same-sex attraction and then carry on.

I hate this whole affair when you have to take someone to one side and tell them, or if the topic of sexuality ever pops up, you have to do the whole "by the way..." thing. Aside from the whole 'I-might-get-murdered' thing, the worst part of being gay is how literally every single person you meet will judge who you sleep with. They might at first glance assume you're straight, then once they've heard you speak they might sweep over your fashion sense to re-assess. It's a lose-lose situation where people either assume you're straight and so you know you're gonna have to correct him/her at some point, or they guess correctly and so you're forced to check yourself; being either ashamed or even terrified at what gave you away. This is obviously something to bear in mind all the time when writing a gay character.

But you should never rush the coming out. A while back, Doctor Who featured a new companion, Bill, who enters the room, sits down, and immediately springs into an anecdote about her eyeing up another young woman in the canteen. This anecdote, which occurs around a minute into the episode, is completely irrelevant to the matter at hand. It's supposed to establish she's an eccentric, even though a) 'gay' isn't 'eccentric' you fucking hack, and b) from the very moment she walks in, you can tell she's eccentric. You don't need her to waltz in like "HI I LIKE WOMEN" to achieve this.

What makes this even worse is that about ten minutes later, Bill has a perfect 'coming out' moment that would've worked so much better if this was the first time we realised she was a lesbian. She's in a club and she sees a young woman. They slowly walk towards each-other, staring transfixed all the while. No dialogue is needed. Oh, and the whole episode revolves around the relationship between these two; leading to a heartbreaking conclusion.

The fact that Doctor Who has such moments of brilliance constantly undermined by stupidity is why I hardly watch the show anymore. Do not do this. Don't have "Hello I'm Gay" moments. Have the moment ten minutes later where it's organically introduced into the narrative and plays a key part whilst enhancing the character. We can see that Bill appreciates the meek; that she's empathetic and open-hearted. Use your characters 'coming out' to reveal something else about them too. It's not just unlocking a closet door...it's unlocking their soul.

It doesn't matter if you hold the 'coming out' until near the end of the story. Don't rush it, but don't do a Dumbledore and completely chicken out. ParaNorman has a coming out two minutes before the film ends, but it's done is such a casual yet humorous way that adds another dimension to the character.

Another example would be Ellie from The Last Of Us: Left Behind. In many ways, the game cheats because we already know Ellie very well from The Last Of Us. But in Left Behind, we explore her relationship with Riley. It's not until a few moments before the climax when perhaps the greatest 'coming out' occurs.

We've known Tess and Riley for around two hours now. They've had moments of tension due to an off-screen argument that happened before the events of the game, but they've also been re-kindling their friendship. It's clear that Riley and Ellie are both hiding something from each-other as Riley says she's leaving and Ellie says that's for the best. Riley doesn't want to leave, and so she's trying to get Ellie to insist she stays. Ellie doesn't really want her to leave either, but we know that Ellie wants to be independent. They're both trying to act like adults when really they're just teenagers. But it's only when they start dancing that Ellie finally breaks down and her feelings for Tess explode.



Again, this is the best coming out. The tension between these two has been bubbling throughout the entire game. We've seen them act bitter, sarcastic, and playful. At moments they seem inseparable, but then their intimacy is interrupted by something much greater obstructing them. This coming out is the implosion, as friendship becomes relationship. To not have the kiss  - to not shatter everything - would've ruined the game.


Verisimilitude


Oooh, look at Max using the fancy long words!

'Verisimilitude' is one of the most important parts of writing. It refers to the realism created within the world your narrative's set in. If your story takes place in 19th Century London, then obviously The London Eye's not going to be there. However, if your story takes place in a Steampunk London then there might be some awesome, steam-powered, iron version of The London Eye instead - and that would fit perfectly within the established world. That is Verisimilitude.

I couldn't possibly count the number of fantasy/sci-fi stories that depicts a hetero-normative society when it makes no sense within the Verisimilitude. Why are dragons and orcs more plausible than gay people? Why would homosexuality be taboo in a society that has no religion to condemn 'sodomy' with? Why would a civilisation press a 'one man, one woman' ideology when it's folklore is based around magic fucking rings? Or when you're jetting round on a hover-car? Nothing depresses me more than the thought that we could colonise the galaxy, yet there'll still be homophobia.

Going back to Doctor Who, how is it that the Doctor hasn't had a gay relationship yet? He's an alien. He grew up in a world without a patriarchal system enforcing the man's role as a dominator and the women's as submissive. It's possible that Time Lord's don't even have sex. Who says The Doctor even has genitals? He's a 900 year old with free access to all of time and space. And don't even get me started on how The Master regenerated as a woman, so suddenly she's hyper-sexual (she kisses The Doctor in her very first scene) and has absolutely no problem dealing with the fact that after three male forms she suddenly has breasts.

Another great, stupid example: the Mass Effect games. Apparently in the furthest reaches of the universe, all the aliens are attractive bisexual females. The series gets credit for letting my awesome 'femshep' romance any gender I choose (though, I still went for Kaiden) but it's only for attractive females. Ugly females? Males? Not until the (bad) third game and (horrid) spin-off...and even then, there's no sexy male aliens. The gender neutral alien race still looks female and speaks in a female voice. They're literally just women painted blue and given tentacle-hair; like it's an old Star Trek episode.

Whenever you write a gay character, you must always consider their role in the society you've created. If it's present day then hooray! Just use the research you've already gathered to determine how your gay character will work in your world. If it's another setting then you need to establish how your character will work within their environment. Society and upbringing shapes all of us. Fiction doesn't stop this.


Don't Fucking Bait Us 


This is my least-favourite trope. I hate it so much that I want to say it's homophobic, but there's also a debate that actually this whole practice is increasing LGBT visibility and apparently shit visibility is still preferable to any visibility.

I really don't like Sherlock. It's a pretentious pile of pseudo-zeitgeist shit written by hacks. A good example of this is it's constant homo-erotic overtones, even though the show also goes out of it's way to dismiss any and all speculation of gayness. (The only openly gay character might as well be a space alien given how unrealistic and exploitative her portrayal is.) It thinks it's being so 'edgy' and post-modern by taking the overtones present in the original Arthur Conan Doyle novels and exaggerating them the same way 'edgy' webcomic writers make crude, banal jokes that Batman and Robin do each-other up the butt. Any idiot familiar with 19th/Early 20th Century fiction knows that social attitudes in regards to male relationships were different. Also, the 2009 Guy Richie Shelock Holmes did exactly the same thing.

It's baiting. The fans go mad about it, as they see gay people as a curiosity. We're an object to be written, drawn, and fantasied. This wouldn't be so bad except Sherlock and Watson aren't gay. Every single time the show brings up this tired 'joke' (the fact that sexuality is framed as a joke is another issue for another time) it's immediately shut down by the characters. And yet the 'joke' keeps coming up as sexual ambiguity for the sake of appeasing a niche when none of this results in character or plot development. Both Sherlock and Doctor Who then have the balls to openly mock their fanbase with two horrible 'fangirl' stereotypes, because Steven Moffat and Mark Gatiss are shit-heads.

Baiting makes a mockery of an entire community. Either commit to gay characters, or drop it. Stop making us a joke. We get beaten up because people don't think we're real.


So About That Whole 'Politics' Thing...


Again; any sign of diversity will be taken as a political statement even if it's unintentional. You'll have no choice but to brace yourself for homophobia should you write a gay character. Your story won't be as marketable. Editors will try to downplay or even remove this aspect of your work. A lot of movie listings for gay-themed films such as Pride, Moonlight, or even The Next Best Thing will barely mention that the story is about gay characters.

I played a game when the 2016 Pulse shooting in Orlando occurred. Every time a news outlet referred to Pulse as a 'nightclub' instead of a 'gay club'/'gay bar' I stabbed myself with a pen. It helped me focus my thoughts somewhat...

You're faced with two options: 1) Defiance, or 2) Exploitation. 'Defiance' means you just carry on writing because you're a goddamned genius and no fucker's gonna stop you. Fuck the squeamish whelps who're the main reason why we don't have gay superheroes or gay blockbusters. 'Exploitation' is similar, except you're rubbing the gayness in everyone's face. Oh, you don't want any kissing? Let me just add in a full-on orgy that itself takes place on a gigantic oiled penis.

'Exploitation' dooms your work to the underground, but if you're experiencing artistic satisfaction (or literal satisfaction from all the steamy erotica) then that's absolutely fine. There's a growing trend of both current and former gay porn-stars becoming YouTube vloggers, and this is all mostly fuelled by said porn-stars just not giving a shit - which I find oddly inspiring.

But there's a third option; which I haven't listed because you should never do it. Option Three is to have homosexuality be an issue you kind of raise, only to drop. I don't mean in a Beauty And The Beast sense, where you just ignore it. I mean you acknowledge being gay can suck...but then move onto something completely different. You address the politics but never follow through, when you should always either go all the way or don't even touch on it.

Two of my least-favourite artworks in the world are the film Reality Bites, and the musical Rent. I hate them both for the same reason: they're about white middle-class hipsters who're full of shit...and we're supposed to like them. We're supposed to see them as this lost generation of woefully neglected artists even though their work actually receives plenty of positive attention and they live off-of their loving parents.

Both works also feature gay subplots. Reality Bites features a young gay man (who's the only likeable character) unable to come out to his father, and Rent takes place amidst the backdrop of the AIDS crisis; which kills a side-character. Reality Bites just dismisses the sub-plot, even though it's the only part of the movie that concerns a real issue that people in 1994 faced - and still face. Rent is even worse. Angel is a character who catches AIDS in the first act and dies. He then serves only as some sort of spirit guide for our (mostly white and heterosexual) protagonists.

The spectre of AIDS hardly comes up again. Instead, it's about our full-of-shit cast trying to experience artistic fulfilment; mostly by exploiting the struggles of those who're far worse off than they are. The fact that AIDS was a plague that struck down millions; an epidemic ignored by governments because it targeted a group of people they were happy to let die isn't mentioned at all. Like millions of other gay men during the 80's/90's, Angel died for nothing except to prop up a white heterosexual society. We shut our bars. We went back in the closet. We quietly crept into coffins so you could run around in loose-fitting suits with brick-sized phones.

This dumbfuckery leads me nicely to my final advice:


Try NOT To Kill Your Gay Character


There's an unsettling trend of gay characters dying. It's traditional in horror movies that the black protagonist (for there is only ever one) won't make it to the end, and it seems gay is the new black.

Unless you're George R. R Martin, where killing people is your kink, then try not to use your token minority character as a mere device to provoke drama. The same should apply to all your heterosexual characters also. Never kill for the sake of killing. Unless you're doing a Titus Andronicus-style dark comedy (please do) then death is a huge event that should never be taken lightly.

Obviously not everyone can survive. If your story is set in a particularly violent world, or your characters face violence, then it's natural a body-count will pile. But don't just kill your gay character to add drama. Don't have it so your characters lover can turn to the camera and say "I will have my revenge" - only to then disappear from the plot altogether as your hetero main protagonist is given yet another crutch.

I'm not bitter. Who said anything about being bitter? IT'S NOT LIKE MY PEOPLE CONTINUE TO BE ERASED EVEN AS SHITHEADS PRETEND TO STAND BY US WHILST SLOWLY PAINTING US ALL WHITE FUCKING COCKSUCKING SHITHEAD CU-

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